The Bodyguard: Guard Your Heart

For our “Monday Movie Nights: Romance Rumble” we decided on The Bodyguard.

The movie is about Rachel Marron (played by Whitney Houston), a pop music superstar whose manager enlists the services of semi-retired bodyguard Frank Farmer (played by Kevin Costner) after she receives a number of threatening letters.  You know, the kind sent in the mail and constructed from individual letters cut out of magazines and glued onto a blank page.  This tipped me off that the film may not be your typical romance.  The film genre really is a cross of drama/thriller/romance.

*SPOILER ALERT*

Early on in the film Rachel acts like an entitled princess, lashing out at Frank for interfering with her life style, although it is discovered that her manager held back the seriousness of the letters/happenings (someone broke into her mansion and ejaculated on her bed).  Somehow despite both having terrible first experiences they continue working in each other’s company.  Frank spends some of his spare time watching Rachel’s music videos that are just of her singing and he starts to become enthralled with her, but tries to remain professional.  Rachel slowly develops a trust for Frank and eventually when she discovers the seriousness of the threats (It turns out there is an assassin AND a masturbator after her) she falls in love with him.  This seems a bit selfish.  “My life is at risk and you’re capable of protecting me AND serving my intimate needs… I love you”.  After they do the dirty Frank gets post-coital tristesse and tells her that it was mistake to sleep with his client.

Later in the film it is discovered that Rachel’s sister, who was present throughout the movie, had paid a hitman to kill Rachel out of jealousy.  Frank successfully protects Rachel, but her sister gets her just desserts when the assassin somehow mistook her for Rachel in the dark and shot her.  The final scenes totally destroy any romance that might have been left between Frank and Rachel.  She and Frank have a moment at the airport as she is boarding her plane.  She talks about her new bodyguard (who we can only assume she now sleeps with) and gets on her plane only to run out after it starts moving then runs over to kiss Frank with “I Will Always Love You” playing.  The best scene of the entire film is after this when it’s clear they have parted ways and the camera slowly zooms in on Frank awkwardly standing behind a speaker at the governors’ ball and just freezing on his sad monotone face.

I did enjoy the few plot twists like there being two stalkers and the sister being shot, but I couldn’t help but be turned off by the flashy arrogant life of a pop music superstar.  Much of this film was disjointed fluff that only really seemed to come together toward the end when the film took on its identity as a thriller.

Highlights:

• Rachel’s perpetually sleepy half-mast eyes
• The need for a bodyguard to have the skills and weapons necessary for an assassin (as well as his ex-bodyguard friend who now works as a contract killer)
• Whitney Houston singing her songs throughout the entire movie and every music video is just of her, by herself, singing
• Kevin Costner does a pretty decent job of being a badass
• Rachel’s ridiculous space outfits

  

• Somehow you end up feeling bad for the creep masturbating stalker after he gets caught (he’s still totally a creep)

Guest review by Dan